Today is the Last Day...

Today is the last "Official" day of watching James. I didn't realize what a momentous occasion it would be. His mother is a teacher, so today is also the last day of classes in our area. Since December, I have wondered if James had learning disabilities or autistic. I have now come to the conclusion that he just doesn't like me. What I see with him not giving me eye contact or his lack of communication with me is his passive aggressive nature. It has been a frustrating and exhausting few months.

Now, I am not saying that our incompatibility is all one sided, my family has a saying, "My crow is the blackest." I believe we all have different spiritual gifts, one is to love every and all children as your own. I know I don't possess that one, but I do like other peoples children from arms length.

I have also felt a sense of being home-bound. I have only one car seat and since James and Abby have recently learned to walk, I haven't been able to take them anywhere. Another problem I have faced is with Abby and her many appointments. Between hearing tests, doctors' appointments, speech therapy, and play dates it has been hard for me to juggle schedules around to accommodate everyone.

Today, I just have a feeling of relief...